In the previous blog in this series, we saw that God gives grace to the empty. In order to receive grace, it’s good to be open to it.
Receiving grace often involves asking for help. Asking for help can make many of us uncomfortable. We share our weakness, so we could get hurt in the process. In essence, it makes us vulnerable. Brené Brown has a lot of wise words to say on this topic. She says it takes courage to be vulnerable, but it’s vital to do so in order to form meaningful relationships. Asking for help is not easy, but it’s vital.
In this passage, we’ll see how Ruth asked for help. It also put her in a vulnerable position, but she had the courage to ask.
Ruth 3:1-18 (NIV)
One day Ruth’s mother-in-law Naomi said to her, “My daughter, I must find a home for you, where you will be well provided for. Now Boaz, with whose women you have worked, is a relative of ours. Tonight he will be winnowing barley on the threshing floor. Wash, put on perfume, and get dressed in your best clothes. Then go down to the threshing floor, but don’t let him know you are there until he has finished eating and drinking. When he lies down, note the place where he is lying. Then go and uncover his feet and lie down. He will tell you what to do.”
“I will do whatever you say,” Ruth answered. So she went down to the threshing floor and did everything her mother-in-law told her to do.
When Boaz had finished eating and drinking and was in good spirits, he went over to lie down at the far end of the grain pile. Ruth approached quietly, uncovered his feet and lay down. In the middle of the night something startled the man; he turned—and there was a woman lying at his feet!
“Who are you?” he asked.
“I am your servant Ruth,” she said. “Spread your wings over your servant* [the corner of your garment over me1], since you are a guardian-redeemer of our family.”
“The Lord bless you, my daughter,” he replied. “This kindness is greater than that which you showed earlier: You have not run after the younger men, whether rich or poor. And now, my daughter, don’t be afraid. I will do for you all you ask. All the people of my town know that you are a woman of noble character. Although it is true that I am a guardian-redeemer of our family, there is another who is more closely related than I. Stay here for the night, and in the morning if he wants to do his duty as your guardian-redeemer, good; let him redeem you. But if he is not willing, as surely as the Lord lives I will do it. Lie here until morning.”
So she lay at his feet until morning, but got up before anyone could be recognized; and he said, “No one must know that a woman came to the threshing floor.”
He also said, “Bring me the shawl you are wearing and hold it out.” When she did so, he poured into it six measures of barley and placed the bundle on her. Then he went back to town.
When Ruth came to her mother-in-law, Naomi asked, “How did it go, my daughter?”
Then she told her everything Boaz had done for her and added, “He gave me these six measures of barley, saying, ‘Don’t go back to your mother-in-law empty-handed.’ ”
Then Naomi said, “Wait, my daughter, until you find out what happens. For the man will not rest until the matter is settled today.”
It’s a strange thing for a woman to go to a man alone at night and propose marriage. (Perhaps this was an accepted cultural practice of that day.) Nothing untoward happened here. But it could have. Boaz could have taken advantage of the situation. He did not. Boaz called Ruth a woman of “noble character” in this passage, so it is likely he did not see Ruth’s request as seductive or unseemly. Whether this was the wisest way to ask him for marriage is another matter. Ruth did know from experience though, that he was an honorable and trustworthy man, and that definitely makes a difference!
I don’t think we should ask for marriage the same way Ruth did. Still, we can draw lessons from this for our own lives too. To ask for help often makes us vulnerable. We can be hurt in the process. It is still important to make ourselves vulnerable and to be willing to ask God and others for help nevertheless.
We all need people to turn to when the going gets rough. Ruth’s took “refuge under the wings of” Boaz. This mirrors a previous passage, where Boaz told Ruth, “May the Lord repay you for what you have done. May you be richly rewarded by the Lord, the God of Israel, under whose wings you have come to take refuge” (Ruth 2:12). God is our refuge and He often uses other people to be a refuge for us. So let’s be willing to be vulnerable, both with God and with with others.
This means sharing our stories, pain and tears with others who we can trust. Let me add that we should still be careful to choose who to trust. Still, sharing is important. And we can shelter others as well and be that safe place for others. We can help them feel at home.
Jars of Clay wrote a song called Shelter. It says: “In the shelter of each other we will live”. Often we show God’s love and His shelter to others, and find God’s shelter through others. As Christians, we are part of the body of Christ. We find help and healing through others in His body as well.
Shelter – Jars of Clay
Questions
How do you find shelter with God?
How do you find shelter with others?
What makes you hesitant to be vulnerable with God?
What makes you hesitant to be vulnerable with others?
How can you change this?
Deeper 